Accentuating the Positive & Finding Probable Solutions to the Negative:My Own 21-Day No-Complaint Experiment


I’ve been doing a whole lot of soul searching lately and the things I am finding as I dig deeper, are beginning to push me towards the consumption of larger amounts of PBR . This sort of thing generally happens as I approach my birthday, celebrate it, then come to the realization that I have chalked up another year of debt, missed goals, aches, pains, and irritations, (including those which bring forth the use of Anti-Monkey Butt Powder), only to find myself just as uncertain of my future as I was the year before.

This most recent head first dive into the depths of post birthday depression actually got into full swing on the day of my birth a few weeks back.  I was given the news that, effective immediately, my producer and program director would no longer be interested in continuing their involvement with Wailing with Wing Side Up.  There’s a lot of different reasons for this, some of which are justified on their part, some of which I believe were motivated by the desire for something more than I could give them at this time-namely cash.

Either way, what’s done is done, and even though it wasn’t a very nice way to celebrate, I attempted to do damage control the best way I know how-call Annamarie.  It certainly isn’t the first time we’ve been faced with this issue of having what I would call growing pains.  Several times now, (and many more times in the future I’m sure), there have been some pretty big roadblocks thrown up for which a long, tedious, and treacherous detour was required.  With all the road miles I rack up in a year chasing supermodifieds, I encounter many detours, but let me tell you, this latest one, (and I hate to admit it for fear of giving some people a chance to gloat over my distress), was one of the bumpiest, twisted, and longest yet.

I’ve always prided myself on digging in and getting to the task of ‘fixing’ things.  The more people tell me it can’t be done, or attempt to derail my plans and dreams, the more I set my sites on proving them wrong.  I’m not sure if that’s a  good cause for motivation or not, but at the very least, it moves me to action.

There’s been a few options that I’ve found to keep the ball rolling.  One is going to be very expensive, but would really take Wailing with Wing Side Up to a new level of cross promotion and as a result expose supermodified racing to a newer, more varied demographic.

The other one is free, was easily set up, worked flawlessly, and is very exciting to me.  Yet, it adds to my plate from the production side because, as of now, I am the only one around here that has any idea about how to put a show together.  It’s called Ustream.tv and I think that it has a lot of potential, not only for Wing Side Up, but again for supermodified racing as a whole.  I got it set up and rolling in a matter of hours, but I wasn’t completely happy with how it all came out The show certainly wasn’t as polished or professional as many of the others on Ustream, and with my mediocre production talents, not nearly as good as what fans of Wailing with Wing Side Up have come to expect.  So even though I found a solution to a negative, I found myself complaining a lot about having to find a solution to begin with.

I originally came across Ustream by chance after checking in on Tim Ferris’ blog.  I mentioned Tim Ferris in a prior blog and described how, after watching a video of him talking about blogging that I originally found on Frank McMahon’s blog, I felt like I had learned how to implement some of his blogging techniques right here and now.

As I stepped further outside of my comfort zone and started to explore Ferris’ blog, I came across a post that dealt with what he called “The 21-Day No-Complaint Experiment.”   In it he described how he agrees with Will Bower, (a Kansas City minister who came to recognize that word choice can have an effect on your thoughts, actions, and emotions and it can be positive or negative.

According to Ferris,

Will designed a solution in the form of a simple purple bracelet, which he offered to his congregation with a challenge: go 21 days without complaining. Each time one of them complained, they had to switch the bracelet to their other wrist and start again from day 0. It was simple but effective metacognitive awareness training.

As I read the rest of the entry, I came to the realization that I had been doing a lot of complaining lately, without any probable solutions to the situation.  I kept finding plenty of reasons why the show would falter without looking at ways to dig in and keep it going.  I found myself being more worried about keeping the quality of the show high instead of  keeping something period.  I was processing a whole lot of negative thoughts and feelings and it was bringing me down.

I decided that enough was enough and that instead of wasting my time coming up with words to complain about the situation, that not only would I change the words I had been using for this particular issue, I would also attempt to implement it as it pertains to what I always am preaching about supermodified racing, meaning that I needed to work harder at ‘Accentuating the Positive’.  I took on the challenge, and I now have a bracelet on my wrist and I’ve had to switch wrists several times already because of saying things that qualify as ‘complaints’.  I’ve got a feeling that it’s going to be a long 21 days.

I hope you didn’t just think of a word that could be used to make fun of me wearing a bracelet, because as I have read that would probably lead to a negative statement that, in this experiment,  would cause you to change the wrist the bracelet is worn on.

The bracelet I am wearing is one donated to me by my niece.  It is red and it says on it-”Riley Hospital for Children-Hope Happens Here.”  So not only has it become a reminder to me to “Accentuate the Positive & Find Probable Solutions to the Negative,”  it also serves to remind me that in the big scheme of things, especially compared to those kids at Riley, I don’t have too much to complain about in life.

I’m pretty sure that the same could be said of supermodified racing.  Think about it.

Bing had it right!
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About Bobby G
  • Craftpug

    I have to say that I was curious when you first asked me if Samantha had a bracelet that you could use, but didn’t really ever consider looking into it for myself. After the holidays were over I had a lot of free time on my hands, in fact to much. I was occupying my time with crochet and knitting projects but still feeling down, I was to say the least a bit depressed. I began to feel sorry for myself. It wasn’t untill Sam ended up in the emergency room at the hospital that I began to shake myself out of it. On our way back to the er room the staff was bracing themselves for several trama patients.
    We of course had to wait quite awhile because they were tending to them. I understood that and didn’t complain. As the morning progressed we heard that one child didn’t make it. After having to move Sam, because of more critical patients we heard that this same family had an other daughter in the same er. Wow was I thankful that even though I didn’t yet know why my child was ill, I wasn’t going hearing that kind of news. We left the hospital wondering what had caused this accident. Upon returning home we discovered that the Suv that these kids were in slid on ice into on coming traffic and burst into flame killing the one child, burning another and sending 2 more to the er we were at. I have to say that I really felt grateful that we were home safe and Sam was on the mend. I started thinking more about the red bracelet you had put on your arm. It was about a month after this that I put a bracelet on my arm. We were going to a community service project for 4-H. Sam’s leader is a great person, but sometimes can be overbearing with the kids. I knew that I may get irritated and thought that maybe the bracelet on my arm would help me to remember to keep any thoughts to myself. I have to say that it helped but I did have to change arms once while I was there. It makes you take responsibility for what you have said. I have not yet gone a day without switching, I am as you know well a natural pessimist. This is something that I have been trying to change for a long time. I started reading A Complaint Free World this week. You are always saying accentuate the positive, so I am following your lead. I am now on day 2 of my 21 days.

  • http://www.abcbrown.com Biggie G

    1) I totally feel ya on re-evaluating your state of being. The “State of Bobby G” address is the same as the “State of Biggie G” address in essence

    2) My pastor always says you speak life and death with your words… and when you think about the Bible, and everytime God spoke, things happened. I’m not saying WE’RE God, BUT, we are created in the IMAGE of God… so it stands to reason that we must be careful and measure our words.

    3) I’m not only proud of you Bob, but I am inspired to do the same

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